To be a Liberal

Here's something I wrote some years ago and it is as true today as it was back then:

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To be a liberal, you have to believe the AIDS virus is spreading due to a lack of funding.

To be a liberal, you have to be against capital punishment but for abortion on demand - in short - you support protecting the guilty and killing the innocent.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that the same public school system that can't teach 4th graders how to read is capable of teaching those same kids about sex.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that trial lawyers are selfless heroes and doctors are overpaid, greedy, bad guys.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than nuclear weapons in the hands of the Red Chinese.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the brilliance of the Sun, and more affected by yuppies driving SUVs.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being gay is natural.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that the biggest threat to this country are those who believe morals, ethics, and family-values are essential.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that punishment for a crime should depend on motive, i.e. killing a person because they dislike them is worse than killing that same personbecause they want their money.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that killing a child in the womb should be legal, but breaking an eagle's egg should be criminal.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that good intentions are equal to actually accomplishing something.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that the government should reward those who contribute the least and punish by taxing those who work hard and succeed.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that governmental laws and regulations are the answer, not freedom and competition.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that art would not exist without federal funding.

To be a liberal, you have to believe the military, not corrupt politicians, start wars.

To be a liberal, you have to believe the NRA is bad, because of its support for certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good, because of its support for certain parts of the Constitution.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that minorities are not capable of making it without your help and conservatives are racists because they believe everyone should be treated as equal.

To be a liberal, you have to believe that cigarettes pose more danger to our kids and our society than illegal drugs.

In Summary, To be liberal, you have to allow your thoughts and actions to be governed by emotional, feel-good rhetoric and disregard, without any consideration, all intellectual responses.